There is no C in Extreme Sports

Mood: Extreme

Currently multitasking with: reading tutorials on frosted glass filter on Photoshop and admiring the transparent monitor illusions of others

Extreme sports have been around nearly several millenium, starting with the Romans who practised extreme goddess worship and extreme oppression of the Jewish people back in Jesus' day. It evolved slowly, with each nation and continent having their own unique extreme sports.

For Ancient China, it was extreme assasination of emperors and in Japan, it was extreme mass production of Sanrio merchandise. All of these extreme sports were widely recognized as fair and worthy because any typical citizen could participate, which is the embodiment of the right attitude towards sport.

Throughout the years, many historical revolutions have occurred, such as Che Guevara's appearance on mainstream attire and Chairman Mao's own line of shoulder bags. In the department of extreme sports, many extreme sportsmen and sportswomen have petitioned to the International Olympic Conclave (IOC) to have extreme sports added into the Olympic competition.

Critics and underqualified journalists deemed this to be a little "extreme" (excuse the cheesy pun), and labelled the petitioners to be "extremists" (OMG MOAR PUNS). Consequently, in an act of hypocrisy so in-character with those involved in journalistic practise, they founded their own extreme sport: extreme condemnation of anyone and everyone in text.

The most notable extreme sportsmen and sportswomen in history:

Coco Kohler (2002-present), a German extreme sportwoman who participated in
extreme skulling of carbonated beverages without opening the can.

Goner Rhea (1962-1965), a Scottish extreme sportman who was a champion at extreme attraction of sexually transmitted diseases. Rhea is most noted for being part of his sport during a time when there was no treatment available for STDs.

Jack Bauer (Season 1-Season 6), star of Fox action series 24, is the ultimate undisputed world champion of extreme survival of incapitating injuries at 6am to die another day.

Chuck Norris (as Texas Ranger Walker), is so damn extreme, he participates in extreme roundhouse kicking of innocents because there are no disabled people - only people who have met Chuck Norris.

Grim "Death" Reaper, most infamous for slacking off on the job, he is the only player of extreme scythe-toting and has won every award for this extreme sport, even though he has only shown up at 25 out of the 560 meets that have taken place.

Extreme sports are serious business and should only ever be played while you are accompanied by an adult so you can whoop their ass and show them who's boss. Please note that Nintendo Wii Tennis does not count as an extreme sport. Any delusion or hallucination you have while playing the Nintendo Wii is only a result of Nintendo's mind-controlling technology that will cause you to be smitten by crappy video games like Super Smash Brothers Melee (which is a really crappy game).

It has also been reported that Nintendo is due to release a new game of the SSB franchise called Extreme Super Smash Brothers Melee and Ranged Attacks (shortened to ESSBMARA) on the Nintendo Wii. President Mario has expressed his naivety in believing that this game will be popular because of the growing popularity of extreme sports. The Letter C would like to add that adding the word "extreme" to your video game title is hardly as effective as it seems. We have a tip for you Nintendo. The moment you put "Final Fantasy" in one of your game titles is the moment you earn big bucks and get your ass sued. Now that would be some extreme video game corporation drama, much like the time Microsoft offered to buy Sony.