01 November, 2006

TLC puts the C in Pac-Man

Mood: Not in the mood to study
Currently listening to: Radiohead - Creep

Dear reader, you may have noticed that the post title theme has taken a different turn. Yes, you've guessed it. In accordance to the Nerdy and Undereducated Newsreporters Society's (NUNS) code of ethics, never in my entire career as a journalist, whether I be pseudo, cadet, or retired am I allowed to write anywhere that the letter C stands for a word that does not begin with the letter C. I am, however, not prohibited by the NUNS to violate trademarking and copyright by turning my blog name into an acronym which also happens to stand for at least another 15 different things (Wikipedia: TLC). And from now on, along with the standard citing of reliable sources, Wikipedia articles will be linked when necessary and have been coded to open in a new window for your convenience. Thankyou for taking the time to read this introductory paragraph unrelated to Pac-Man.

In the summer of 1969, 4 years after Richard Gere was caught on camera enjoying a green tea icecream from a Shinjuku noodle bar, a famous Japanese performer by the name of Suzuki Paku(Wikipedia: Article not found) was filming an advertisement for a brand of Japanese pancakes on the streets of Akihabara. Suzuki was an avid supporter of the electronic gaming industry and despite the manager of the advertising company insisting that the commercial be filmed in nearby Ikebukuro, Suzuki was eagerly awaiting the release of Dragon Quest: Origins and had camped outside Go Go Game the night before, a variety game store that closed for renovation in the early 1990s. To this day, it still has not reopened for business. Otaku in the neighbourhood rumour that the shop is haunted and there is a "real" game of Resident Evil happening inside.

On that very day, 15 April, 1969, Suzuki was inspired to take the pancake phenomenon further and shortly after he told the camera crew of his vision, they told him of a gypsy only known as Namuko-sama and that he should seek this gypsy out. As the gender of Namuko-sama was unknown at the time, the usage of a pronoun co-referenced with Namuko-sama in the previous sentence would have created ambiguity and was ommitted for semantic purposes. It took Suzuki 8 years to find this enigmatic gypsy and then another 2 years for Namuko-sama, who is actually better known as Namco, the creator of retro classics such as Galaga.

Pac-Man has indeed come a long way, working his way into other gaming genres with spinoffs like SixPac-Man, IcePac-Man, JetPac-Man, WolfPac-Man, LeaderOfThePac-Man (Wikipedia: Articles not found), and the ever-controversial, TuPac-Man. For legal reasons, TLC cannot provide a link to the Wikipedia article for the Pac-Man spinoff TuPac-Man. TLC's lawyers maintain that it would be unwise to claim any affiliation with American poet Tupac Shakur, in the event that he was still alive. Namco also worked with Blizzard Entertainment in producing StimPac-Man, which was a Starcraft/Pac-Man crossover in which your Terran Marine would be chased by Zerglings (instead of Ghosts) around the maze. Some fans found it a bit quaint that Namco helped promote tourism to regions of South Asia with the release of Pacistan (Pronounced [paːkɪst̪aːn]) .

And today, as gamers in their 50s reflect back on the days of retro gaming, Pac-Man will undoubtedly be considered one of their all-time favourites (Game Addicted Youths' Binary Omnibus, 2005) alongside Tetris and Street Fighter II. The older members of Generation Y may also have had the chance to appreciate the great gaming experience that is Pac-Man. May the legend of the Japanese pancake be more than just a memory and live strong in the hearts of all ugly, lifeless nerds.

*DISCLAIMER: Although the Wikipedia article for Pac-Man clearly states that Pac-Man was a character invented by a Namco employee named Iwatani Toru, a very reliable source informed TLC long ago that this article has been heavily vandalised by satirists in an act of what we call, "Trying hard to be funny but failing miserably". As such, TLC maintains that the version of events recorded on this blog are more authentic than Michael Jackson's nose. In addition, TLC sends their sincere condolences to any fans of Tupac Shakur who were offended by the untasteful joking of his mortality. TLC's lawyers have been paid a sum to sign a total of 2 documents and nothing more. Should full charges be pressed against the letter C , um... well, we actually haven't thought that far ahead yet.

4 comments:

jayjayne said...

"May the legend of the Japanese pancake be more than just a memory and live strong in the hearts of all ugly, lifeless nerds."

Classic, my dear Charles, classic. Amazing how you never fail to amuse and tingle the witticism senses.

*Tips the glass or Shiraz in your direction and drinks to your pop-culture promiscuity*

Binjamin McJuice said...

Do you enjoy satire dear Miss Jayne?

jayjayne said...

Oh yes.

Tasty.

:B

Binjamin McJuice said...

IT IS NOT EDIBLE DELIGHTS! WAAAaaaaa mmmmm i enjoy eating binary code o_O